On purpose

Purpose is self refuting.

The assumption is that we need purpose to live.

The problem then is not how to achieve the purpose.

That’s the last thing you want if purpose is what gives life value.

The problem is what to do once the purpose is achieved?

Really purposes are excuses we use to motivate us to play the game.

But the game is fun in and of itself.

It doesnt need an excuse (read purpose).

You want to live?

Why?

Because you want to live.

But instead of standing confidently on that desire we seek to fence ourselves in, to make our position secure.

We feel like we need to justify being here!

That we need a reason.

Please sir dont chuck me out I have a job to do.

I am useful.

I am a slave so let me stay here.

Let me continue living

The depths are there to hide the shallows!

The depths are there to hide the shallows.

Let me unpack.

We have these grand concepts like “good”, “bad”, “love” and “loyalty” (not an exhaustive list)

But all anyone really means when they say something is bad is “I dont like it” or “i dont want that to happen to me” and when they say something is good ” i like it” “I would like it to happen to me”

Love. Romantic love between sexual partners is just window dressing for lust aka “I wanna fuck that”. That is what all the heart pumping, clammy hands… all the physical symptoms of being in love basically to do with arousal.

The heart pumps to engorge and prepare genitals.

Friendship may be the only true deep with nothing to hide but even there it’s not deep. It’s just people enjoying each others character.

(I hope one day to have lust and friendship combined)

And finally loyalty. Oh such a deep profound sentiment. Translated: loyalty = “I want you to be mine to back me up when I’m wrong to deny yourself in favour of me”

Again the running theme through all these sentiments is selfishness, self centred ness. Which isnt necessarily bad but we are ashamed of this in us so we seek to hide it behind this fictions.

We dont need to hide. It would be better to be blatant about what we want with each other.

The depths are there to hide the shallows but the shallows don’t need to be hid.

Just a bit of news about subjective insights.

Subjective insights aka me Christopher Jack has started making youtube videos.

I already have a lot of content up.

Most of it is short and sweet like these blogs.

Limit each video to 5 minutes.

Apart from the book studies which just go on as long as we feel like it in the sesh.

I invite anyone to start book studies with me on my youtube.

Just ask dont be afraid I love studying with people.

Currently have one of me and an American friend bringing out the non-dual teaching of the gospel of John.

The 2nd part is on his channel.

And me and my friend ethan going through Manly P Halls the secret teachings.

Would like someone or some people to start going through a book called the social construction of reality with me.

Anyway yeah check it out. Hi go easy on me I only got the guts to start talking to the camera 8 days ago.

Actually dont go easy. No holes barred I’m a big boy haha.

I’m god!

 

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx3Xfx8QhugxvSLoK3H5YSQ

The ultimate declaration of Christian non-duality.

Christ is in us already.

We are all the son of mankind.

I am that I am. Is the name god gave. And I can say with equal truth as the burning bush that I am that I am.

I am saves. Is the name of Jesus.

Oh great mystery spoken plainly but cryptically.

A truth hidden in plain site for all to see but none to grasp.

I am the way the truth and the life.

I am the truth.

Who are you?

Who says I am when you say i am?

All things are from god through god and to god.

There is nothing but god.

I am god

You’re a commie but you probably don’t know it

Most people when you get down to it agree with communism but they don’t know its called communism, socialism or Marxism.

Because they don’t know what it is they think the USSR was communist.

It wasn’t.

During the 19th century there was a debate amongst the socialists about how to get the means of production out of the hands of private individuals and into the hands of the workers.

One side said that we could use the political institutions (like representative government) to peacefully gain control of the state.

Once control of the state was achieved then they could use the states power to take the means of production from private individuals and give it to society.

Then the state would give more power to the people. Eventually you would have a kind of anarchism. Where the state was either non existent or acted as a pragmatic help for the will of the people.

The only difference between the communists and the socialists was over how to gain control of the state.

The communists were for a violent take over.

Which they did in 1911 I think.

Lenin said that what they had then wasn’t communism but a step towards it.

A bit later Stalin said it was communism.

But it wasn’t because yes the state had taken the means of production but it hadnt given them to the society.

In effect the state became the sole capitalist (USSR, China and most so called communist nations are really examples of state capitalism)

It was a failed attempt at bringing about socialism. All because the attempts to bring it about have failed so far doesn’t mean it is bad or wrong.

All that failed attempts indicate is that a learning process is occurring.

There were numerous failed attempts before capitalism managed to take over from feudalism.

And many atrocities especially committed against children in the industrial revolution.

Sexual objectification

Sex object is one level of a man or a woman.

One of my favourite levels.

But there are others.

People are silly for denying the sex object level.

Why do you want to diminish yourself.

You’re a sex object, an intellectual mind, an emotional being and a spiritual entity.

All because you are a sex object doesnt mean you’re not anything else.

How I reconcile being a socialist whilst holding that everything is god

There’s 2 levels.

There’s the big picture and then there’s my character within the big picture.

The big picture is that I’m not in control. My choices and my actions arise from beyond me.

My desires and aggravation are part of the big picture.

So I can let this character called Chris Jack go on his mission and have his passions because they are there.

All because I dont have free will doesnt mean that I can’t exert myself to make my life and the life of others better as I see better.

The big picture is that god acts through us individuals.

That is individuals are the acts of god.

I think you can put all the ills in the world down to the fact that there is exploitation going on.

That’s what makes it so that I and almost everyone else can’t do what we want when we want as much as possible.

Just so a small group can do what they want when they want all the time.

It would be better – or more honestly – I would prefer it if we maximised and equalised the amount of time everyone could spend doing what they want when they want.

That’s what I want.

I want that because god or reality made me want it.

The capitalist wants what he wants because god made him want it.

And so the stage is set for god to have a good, old, dramatic scrap with himself.

You’re bothered by taxes? What about profit?

The problem isn’t the taxes.

It is the profit you make for the boss that is the problem.

For every hour someone works they give a significant portion of what they produce to a class of people that do nothing.

The bosses and shareholders.

But most people don’t see this because the amount is subtracted from the wage before it is put into a wage slip.

For example my boss is paid 14 pound an hour to hire me.

He does no work. Yet of that 14 pound I get 7 something and he gets the rest.

It should be mine.

Basically every hour I work half an hour for my money for myself and the other half im doing my job for nothing.

That is 50% of my income goes to my boss as profits.

It’s only like 10% of my income that goes to tax.

I’d be an idiot if I was angry about the 10% taken in tax (and thats 10% of the 50% my boss leaves me with) but not angry about the 50% my boss steals.

Especially considering what taxes are meant to be for (NHS, infrastructure, schools etc for everyone) and what the profit is for (yachts, mansions and fast cars for a few private individuals).

I must get my satisfaction.

We’re seeking satisfaction right.

That is what all pursuits are doing.

Fullness. Oneness. Wholeness. Health. Stoned. Drunk. Wealth. Whatever.

We’re seeking satisfaction.

We think that once this or that condition is met then we can sit down and be satisfied.

Once I have saved enough, when I have a house, a car, a holiday, when I am drunk or stoned then I can sit down and be satisfied.

And maybe the fundamental reason we are not satisfied is because we are seeking satisfaction.

All these conditions can be seen as excuses. Put offs. I’ll be happy then but not now.

Who told us we are unsatisfied and must be satisfied. Can you remember when you thought this through?

No?

We assume we are unsatisfied and so look around for stuff to want.

That’s what boredom is right. Looking for stuff to want.

What if you stop seeking satisfaction and just be. Maybe then after you forget about satisfaction are you satisfied.

That’s what I think enlightenment is. And I think everyone flits in and out of it all the time.

My faith in christian language.

I’m in the intermediate state between fully trusting Christ.

In that I still think there is something I can say and some thing that they can follow that will save them.

But it is entirely the work of god.

That I am a mere spectator.

You know god is god.

God is god!

I’m not in charge.

I’ve tried and I still try to be in charge.

I still try to tell people what to do.

How to live their lives.

But faith is faith and sight is sight.

Faith is not sight.

I think I see what is the correct or best way to live life.

But that is not faith.

Faith is to know that god is in charge.

That things may not be going as I think they should but god is in charge.

That by me disagreeing with the way things are going.

And I do. I think they could be so much better.

But that is not faith.

The crux is the good news.

That god is in charge and that god is love.

That he has the best of intentions for us.

That everything that happens. Whether we think it good or evil is in the plan of god.

And he wills that none should perish.

So we or rather I beyond sight have faith in 2 things. Or maybe 3.

God is in charge.

God is responsible for everything.

God is both willing and able to fulfill his desires.

And he loves us.

That is the good news and the crux of my view of scripture and the world.

The whole thing is a work in progress.

And he is both willing and able to bring it all to a heavenly conclusion.

Everything in opposition to this is a lack of faith in god.

I am not in control of me or anyone else.

But god is..

And thank God that he is.

This is the faith that lets me wander and return.

To mess up sometimes or most of the time.

Because I believe that in the end he has me.

I don’t need to behave all the time.

I don’t mean I do things that hurt other people.

For me personally sometimes I get drunk.

According to some churches I live in sin with my girlfriend.

I work as a support worker.

I love my job. Bringing joy and looking after people who can’t look after themselves.

But sometimes I get drunk.

Sometimes I say I’ll do things and don’t do them.

But the good news is (at least as I see it) that this doesn’t matter.

Somebody else is in charge. Somebody much more capable than me. Somebody who knows and understands everything that is going on and has total control over it all.

So I don’t fight myself.

And the funny thing is I have found that by this not fighting myself or others I have become more and more stable as time has gone on.