Beauty is a dance

between the person seen and the person seeing.

It is not fat

It is not thin

because beauty is in everything.

It’s a shimmer unseen

that glimmers and teems

over surfaces that seem

mundane to the wrong eyes.

It’s a turn of thought

A head on it’s side

a way of seeing that brings in the tide.

It’s powerful

it stirs loins

and baffles minds

it is what we live for.

Beauty is a dance

between the seen and the seer.

It appears on the scene

when your mind is clear


without the stupid idea

that beauty is only

here or there.




We have better things to learn from children than they from us!

Today at work, whilst I was cleaning the windows; there were a group of mothers with their children. The children were all toddlers.

They were running around trees in ecstasies of delight.

The children that is; not the adults. They were just stood with their prams and their touch-screen phones sedately discussing the weather (which was glorious).

As I listened I heard the mothers say things like “Yes! That’s a tree, dear!” as if by giving a word for the thing that the child was frolicking around was something marvellous.

The child already knew what a tree was! He didn’t care about its name; he was already using it; he was already enjoying it.

I realized we have a lot more important and valuable things to learn from children than children have to learn from us.

The one thing children have that we don’t need is the need for approval.

We’re all born “approval junkies” as the brilliant film “revolver” states.

The function of the desire for approval is to motivate the child to learn to function in the world. To give it the umph necessary to enter new realms of play.

But once this function is fulfilled the need for approval becomes a bane. It become The (with a capital T) curse that stops us playing, frolicking and using life for what life’s for: fun.

What we need to learn from the child is to be care-free; to play; to run around trees giggling in delight.

What we need to learn from children is that fun is free; play is the purpose of life; to laugh hysterically at apparently inconsequential things and to laugh at the stares!

And parents need to stop inculcating shame (a consequence of the need for approval) into their children. But I know, I know! You’re so caught up so much in the anxiety caused by your child acting out of the ordinary that you can’t help it.

Oh please like and subscribe. I’m still an approval junkie; a dog that wags its tail when you pat its head and tell it it’s been a good boy!

Naked Revolution

Naked Revolution.


The thing is freedom!


I should be free to wear nothing if I want to!


Clothes cost money and take effort to put on; all you have to do if you don’t want to see me naked is not look at me.


You know turn your head. You’re doing it all the time anyway so it’s not really that out of your way now is it?

But for me to pander to you commercially inspired social conditioning I have to waste money and effort on trousers, shirts and what not.

You know what I think you should do? Yes you with the morally outraged look on your face. I think you should fuck off!

In a Slump

In a Slump.


I’m in a similar position. There’s only so many knock-backs you can take before you start to think “Am I an alien? Am I on the right planet, amongst the right people, am I right!”

And what the bleep does right mean anyway” what is it that makes two people click? It certainly isn’t shared interests because loads of couples happily get along without sharing interests. I mean stereotypical man is a sports loving meat-head who hates the dainty womany things woman love.

It’s not even love I think! Have you seen the arguments some of these “Lovers” have. Admittedly they do seem to have great sex after it…

Maybe that’s all it is. Sexual chemistry. But our society has placed a taboo on giving each a go before you’ve matched on all the levels that don’t seem to actually effect whether or not your going to be compatible.

All the successful couples I know of began fucking and then got to know each other. There’s nothing wrong with that but this thick-headed, stubborn society will insist on using promiscuity as a derogatory remark when directed towards the female sex!

Fucking society

The disabled and our reaction to them – plus a tangential bit on bullying

There’s a woman who works at a shop I go to sometimes; She has a disfigured face.


A lump protrudes above her eye-ball and there is scarring down her cheeks.


She’s also small; almost a midget.


I don’t really look at her because I worry that by doing so I will offend her.


I do this despite knowing that by not looking at her I am labelling her as something not to be looked at.


That I am depriving her of the fundamental human necessity of being recognized as a fellow human being; the most basic form of which is eye contact and a look in the face.


It’s just to make eye-contact; or to even look at her face, feels like taking a dive off a cliff.


Not because she is ugly but because I am worried that it’s not socially appropriate to stare at deformed people.


Plus I don’t really know when a normal “looking at” becomes a “staring”.


She must be constantly reminded of her face in the eyes of others.


Downcast like mine or staring like someone braver.


It must be an inescapable fact of her life.


In the morning she must look in the mirror and think “I am ugly” on a verbal or non-verbal level.


Was she born like it?


The first gift from God, right after life begins: ugliness.


Growing up, going through school and puberty knowing that you are not attractive.


Looking at everyone else and marking yourself as inferior.


Children can be beastly.


I don’t mean  that in the Edwardian aristocratic sense: “Oh, you are beastly.”


I mean it in the sense that children can be cruel.


They will happily spend hours methodically dismembering one beetle after another; without feeling any sympathy or remorse.


Children would physically dismember each other if only they had the strength.


Instead they do it psychologically.


They mentally dismember the object of their cruelty; when that object is another human child.


Like piranhas swarming round a thrashing monkey they bite and they bite; until the monkey’s form is revealed in it’s skeletal decrepitude.


You will never gain mercy from a child.


I think it’s because they have this belief; somewhere deep down and hidden from the lens of language.


A belief that they are the centre of the universe.


Maybe even that they are the only person that really is.


The only Being in a Being-less world.


That everything and everyone is a mere fiction created for their pleasure or pain; depending on what context the child is in.


I know this from experience.


And sadly I don’t have the solace gained from the moral high-ground; I was bullied and I bullied.


I revelled in the cruelty endemic to youth.


I can’t hide behind the fact that I was just trying to fit in.


It’s that very drive that causes the bullying in the first place.


It’s like saying I’m not responsible for the bath over-flowing I just turned the tap.




(I’m going to have to re-hash my opinions on free-will; it’s not that I believe we have free-will. It’s just that I don’t think free-will or determinism are appropriate terms for human actions)


The Aberrant is the Monster of Society and Society is the Monster of the Aberrant; The grounds for true compassion!


Tis a sad thing that few realize
That all are retards or none are;

That we are all abnormalities
Born with unchosen deformities;

That to call one shameful and evil
Is to call all shameful and evil.


If instead

We realize the truth:
That good and bad are nothing
But ways of saying:

I don’t like this”
And “I like that”

That give the illusion

That justifies the vicious acts
the likes of which were used
As the excuse to commit the acts.

Justice is ever the cover for man’s bestiality.

Have you ever looked

Into the eyes

Of a man

As he describes

What he’d like to do to those “evil” men!

And seen the same “evil”….


Right back out at you.

As if it’s a dog on a leash

Just raring to go.

The collar, my friend, is untied by Justice!

No-one was born,
Given a contract to sign
Then told to live accordingly!

We were born free!

We washed up on the shores of life

Through no will of our own.

We owe no-one nothing!

And guilt is ever the illusion

Of the man who believed

The man at the docks who said

Gotta give us something

To be here mate! It’s only fair!”

And if a man wishes to murder
Who are we to say he’s wrong
In any inaccessibly objective metaphysical sense;
Because all we’re really saying
When we say

Murder is wrong!”
“I don’t want to die, please don’t kill me!”

We have to be honest

About the basis
Of our legal system!

It just so happens the majority
Share preferences
That the majority finds bearable.

So we

The majority

Gang up on the “Aberrant”
On the “Freak”

On the “Retard”

And the “Criminal”

And with no justification

Other than might

We deny them the
Ability for fulfilment.

And I whole-heartedly participate


I don’t want to get hurt,


I want to keep my stuff


I want to live in a world
Where we can all dance

Our freaky dances fearlessly

But there are those whose dance

We cannot tolerate.

We cannot like

Because it stops our dance.

So we gang up
And beat up
Those who can’t step to our rhythm.

To make ourselves feel better

We create the myth of morality,
Of justice!

To cover up the brute fact
Of the brute bullies we really are!

Do you accept this truth?

I do!

But it leaves a foul taste in my mouth.

I must wash it out!
But what’s the answer?

My answer? kind sir:

If the resources are sufficient
Then comfortable accommodations
Are most pertinent.

If not then we are left with the question:

A quick painless death
Or a lifetime in horrid conditions.

Which would you prefer?

Given the choice
I’d give society’s victims the choice.

Seeing as it’s his fate to be decided.

The aberrant

Is a monster to society

And society

Is a monster to the aberrant!

On Love

What does it mean to love? One possible answer would be that love is an extreme preference. People often say “I love chocolate”. What they mean when they say that is that they really like chocolate; that they would prefer chocolate rather than a lot of things. How does that kind of love play out in relationships.

Before I go into an analysis I will try to see more clearly what it is I am looking for. The love I am attempting to understand is not the love of objects. It is not the love that changes. It is the love that is supposed to be the ground of a marriage. The love that God is supposed to have for us.

Does the love that is an extreme form of liking fit the bill? Is that all love then is? A mere quantity of liking? What happens when one’s like changes? In fact doesn’t preference change throughout the day? In the morning I prefer coffee and cereal but as the day progresses I prefer more savory foods.

So what is love? I think love is acceptance. It is to see beyond the mere appearance of a person and see yourself in them. See that the same emotions that drive your foibles drive their foibles. To see that when they shout or get angry they are experiencing the same internal phenomena as you do when you shout or get angry. It doesn’t matter what triggers the internal phenomena – that is what makes us different – it just matters that we share the same internal phenomena. Love is seeing this and accepting the external behaviors as a result.

What determines who we fall in love with? To a large extent I believe that is determined by the acceptance we receive from the other and the acceptance we can give. And that is largely determined by how close are external behavior is. By how understandable we find the other.

People are not at all confusing – or rather what we mean by claiming to be confused by other people is that they experience internal phenomena in response to external phenomena that is different to ours. For example with anger – I may experience anger at being disturbed whilst reading but not at Simon Cowell being obnoxious on Britain’s got talent. To my mother who experiences anger in response to Simon but not in response to being disturbed I am confusing and to me she is confusing.

But that’s a silly usage of the word confusing!

Beauty, Media and Porn: A Man’s Impressions Before and After

Media has robbed people of their innate sense of beauty. The problem with the media is that it sets up a standard and then people – especially men (at least that’s how it seems to me being a man) – think that beauty is determined by how closely a woman resembles this ideal.

Let it be clear: I am not a sexist. Sure if you were to average out scores on physical strength tests men would be “superior” but in the modern world physical strength is an irrelevance. In all relevant factors men and woman are identical. But I am a man who is now talking about beauty and given that my opinions are MINE and are subjective I can only talk about a man’s view of beauty and seeing as I’m a heterosexual they will be about the beauty of women. Disclaimer over.

Recently I quit pornography. I don’t mean I was once a porn-star. I mean I quit watching it. This along with not really watching TV anymore puts me in an ideal position to compare the two states. How I saw women before and after.

The main conclusion I have come to is that I had been robbed. What I naturally found beautiful encompassed much wider range than what I thought I found beautiful under the spell of media.

It’s not that any specific body-shape or type is beautiful. If I try to analyze women I find beautiful in terms of physical characteristics now I find that there are no universals. Rather it’s that a woman’s body expresses her personality. The make-up they wear, the emotion lines they have, the asymmetries of the face. All of it is beautiful. Well not all because sometimes it’s expressing quite grotesque character flaws. Funnily enough some of the women I found beautiful before I find ugly now.

I think a key factor in it is also that I am not gauging women in terms of how it would be to have sex with them. I think that when one stops gauging people in terms of sexual attraction then inner beauty shines out and sexual attraction arises out of that rather than just being a shallow measure of a person. Something that is fleeting.