Today at work, whilst I was cleaning the windows; there were a group of mothers with their children. The children were all toddlers.
They were running around trees in ecstasies of delight.
The children that is; not the adults. They were just stood with their prams and their touch-screen phones sedately discussing the weather (which was glorious).
As I listened I heard the mothers say things like “Yes! That’s a tree, dear!” as if by giving a word for the thing that the child was frolicking around was something marvellous.
The child already knew what a tree was! He didn’t care about its name; he was already using it; he was already enjoying it.
I realized we have a lot more important and valuable things to learn from children than children have to learn from us.
The one thing children have that we don’t need is the need for approval.
We’re all born “approval junkies” as the brilliant film “revolver” states.
The function of the desire for approval is to motivate the child to learn to function in the world. To give it the umph necessary to enter new realms of play.
But once this function is fulfilled the need for approval becomes a bane. It become The (with a capital T) curse that stops us playing, frolicking and using life for what life’s for: fun.
What we need to learn from the child is to be care-free; to play; to run around trees giggling in delight.
What we need to learn from children is that fun is free; play is the purpose of life; to laugh hysterically at apparently inconsequential things and to laugh at the stares!
And parents need to stop inculcating shame (a consequence of the need for approval) into their children. But I know, I know! You’re so caught up so much in the anxiety caused by your child acting out of the ordinary that you can’t help it.
Oh please like and subscribe. I’m still an approval junkie; a dog that wags its tail when you pat its head and tell it it’s been a good boy!